British culture vs american culture dating

The dynamic may or may not move into a serious relationship, but they are not trying to gather other options or back up plans in case it doesn’t. Americans (both men and women) have been socialized to play games, to act unavailable, to wait a particular amount of time before texting back…

There are a set of ritualized rules that are abided by in American dating culture, and if you don’t play within them, you are labeled as desperate or needy or undesirable.

It is frequently said that people somehow just end up together.

Relationships, romantic or otherwise, are not labeled or defined as stringently as in American dating culture.

The American way is loud and even arrogant at times. Call it the revolving door or hedging – there’s the idea in the American approach to dating that there’s always something better around the corner.

With European men, if there’s mutual interest, they keep seeing that person and don’t keep hunting for better options simultaneously. Nor will they freak out when discussions of commitment or future come up.

Now, when I discuss the differences between European and American, I’m referring to a mindset. American men on the other hand, tend to be goal oriented, with the aim of getting laid.

It's customary in France for people to get to know each other slowly and allow romance to develop over time.

I’m not to judge that one is better than the other, and mind you, my observations are based on my own experiences as well as a group of women I’ve interviewed in the last two years.

The below is a list of some of the themes and commonalities observed.

We must take a look at who we are drawn to in the first place, and why.

If you keep attracting (and are attracted to) men who are emotionally unavailable and who treat you poorly, then it really doesn’t matter if your dating prospects are from France, New York, Vancouver or Mars – the shift needs to occur within you first and foremost.

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